talking about talents in general, my girl interupts:
"mommy you have a talent."
"what is it ash?"
"your talent's love."
moment in bliss.
i love you all!
for a moment anyway.
Thursday, December 30, 2004
Monday, December 20, 2004
no place like hell
since i'm exothermic today, and feel like burning everything in sight, here a good hellish read.
"Chemistry Exam
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of
Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound",
that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of
course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need
to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which
they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state if
you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is
more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than
one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in
Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you" and take into
account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be
true, and thus I am sure Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows
that it is not accepting any more souls
and is therefore, extinct... leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the
existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept
shouting "Oh my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A" ."
"Chemistry Exam
The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of
Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound",
that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of
course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need
to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which
they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state if
you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is
more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than
one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in
Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you" and take into
account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be
true, and thus I am sure Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows
that it is not accepting any more souls
and is therefore, extinct... leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the
existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept
shouting "Oh my God."
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A" ."
Tuesday, December 14, 2004
zoom zoom zoom off to the moon
mad zoom to christmas and all the trimings! been incredible swamped with year end at work and this and that and that and this. making my zillions with my upside down theraphy, uh...not. requests but no one's paid up yet...so Shnewt...show me the money!
exam. wish me luck
x'mas presents, d family done, mine not, but that's because we have to send them away
tree
food
trimmings
more presents (list just get larger with invites and surprise oversea relatives..but very nice, just no time!!)
cards! I've not send them out yet! eeeks
crafts. really crafty this year as this is my mind theraphy
gift exchange and potluck.
i am in so much trouble and so tardy this christmas...sigh...wanna make me happy? here's my wish list:
1. palm pilot
2. flat bed scanner
3. lots of clothes...i'm still growing
4. books...surprise me!
5. food! everything - costco truffles, chips, anything in a neat box would do!
6. a million $
7. silver eyelets at michael's craft store
8. craft hammer at michael's
9. 8" x 11" thick thick craft paper any colour
10. black purse (mine broke..sob!)
11. shoes - high heels size 7 long pointy tips - i LOVE shoes
12. silver chain with closure - for crafts but it looks like the chain for your bathroom sink. the only place i've found them is at Lewiscraft store for 99 cents for two.
13. gift certificates to Michael's craft store, le senza wink!, A & B.
14. help with this awful site. ideas but no idea on how to make it work!
merci~
exam. wish me luck
x'mas presents, d family done, mine not, but that's because we have to send them away
tree
food
trimmings
more presents (list just get larger with invites and surprise oversea relatives..but very nice, just no time!!)
cards! I've not send them out yet! eeeks
crafts. really crafty this year as this is my mind theraphy
gift exchange and potluck.
i am in so much trouble and so tardy this christmas...sigh...wanna make me happy? here's my wish list:
1. palm pilot
2. flat bed scanner
3. lots of clothes...i'm still growing
4. books...surprise me!
5. food! everything - costco truffles, chips, anything in a neat box would do!
6. a million $
7. silver eyelets at michael's craft store
8. craft hammer at michael's
9. 8" x 11" thick thick craft paper any colour
10. black purse (mine broke..sob!)
11. shoes - high heels size 7 long pointy tips - i LOVE shoes
12. silver chain with closure - for crafts but it looks like the chain for your bathroom sink. the only place i've found them is at Lewiscraft store for 99 cents for two.
13. gift certificates to Michael's craft store, le senza wink!, A & B.
14. help with this awful site. ideas but no idea on how to make it work!
merci~
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