a story

so, its been a while as usual, life, busy, etc etc etc.

I have decided to tell a continuous story based on some truths, some exaggerations, some fancyful thinking and some imaginationish stuff.

the fact is, my mind is always talking...

here's a few minutes into my mind....

a story. i could write about....my elementary school play....it was a comedy about a lady who had a belly ache. scene: she went to a walk-in clinic who told her that she need immediate surgery. at the operating table, the doctors and nurses were all exaggeratedly shocked and surprised at all the items coming out of her belly...ridiculous items like a shoe, a chair...can't remember the other items....
audience was belly laughing...i was very proud, i was nine. written and directed:)

this took about five seconds...in thought...

i am now distracted as ambrey walks in, she is a very dramatic child with a oceans of expression...words really fail to translate most of her expression, the wide open eyes filled with blinding brightness as she tell a story...which most of the time is lost as i watch with amazement at the many muscles that make up....

another thought, i once read a book by Malcolm Gladwell, blink, and it refer to someone (can't remember the person) who did a study on facial expression and the many muscles that one uses. According to his studies, our expressions can determine our moods. i.e. if you keep frowning (using muscle this and that, he had numbered them all to some surprising number) you will create negative emotions. He says that we usually think vise versa, that our moods determine facial expressions. He did this study on two tribe of natives i think in Africa, one was a peaceful tribe, and another known to be aggressive. but study their expressions he shocked his peers with being able to determine charteristics in one group toward sexual acts with young boys. can't remember much, should read this again...

how is sexual orientation determined? an aged long debate...that i don't know much about, just bits and pieces that have form my opinions which is ever changing as i encounter more...i believe this is good, as we should always be open enough to change our minds about anything but at the same time be truthful enough to ourselves...

sometimes i think truth itself is a waiving thing, as i struggle most times to understand more...and i do...i really find out i know so much less...which is back to my sometimes ignorant conviction that ignorance is still bliss....

bliss again is an every change state....ok ....this is somewhat ...into a few minutes of my mind's ramblings when i'm not busy....

back to the commencement of my story.

once upon a time, a little girl was born to two grown ups who were very estastic to enter a new stage in their lives. quite unprepared for the bags of emotion and change, the new mom went back to Brunei to work as a executive secretary to the CEO of Shell (the gas co.). there was no maternity leave in 1969.

to be continued....